September 26, 2016

another moment

label: still here — CV @ 9:54 PM

Chasing soap bubbles in the evening sun under the pink skies. Happiness is made of Ayra’s laugh.

September 24, 2016

another morning

label: still here — CV @ 12:57 PM

Happiness is made of mornings like this. Cuddling with my girl, laughing and giggling and tickling and playing. Love fills every corner of the existence on mornings like this.

September 15, 2016

I will

label: still here — CV @ 5:23 PM

Up and down, up and down, black and white, black and white. Rollercoaster all the time. Can I please just exist for a moment? Have a closure with the old and then have a still moment before I move forward?

Stuck in panic attacks. Banging my head against the wall of misunderstandings and miscommunications. Feeling lonely and neglected in every way possible. I have cried for the whole lifetime worth of tears by now. I have cried for all the years I was the “tough girl”. I think I have paid for each wrongdoing in this lifetime and some in advance.

I want closure. I want to move forward. I want … I want peace. I want my head to clear. I want … I will.

September 11, 2016


label: still here — CV @ 10:25 AM

Just another Sunday morning. Nothing special. School started this week so of course I managed to catch something and have been feverish for few days, but this morning I woke up and felt really good. I was going to the kitchen, to make coffee, when I suddenly felt the urge to try a pull-up. I have no idea why.

I did it! First time in my life I managed to do a pull-up. YESH!

I have never managed a pull-up in my life. Ever. So, this year I have been working towards it a bit and had a goal of making a pull-up before I hit 40. I was so suprised of the pull-up that I had to try it again, and again, before I actually believed that it had happen. I have managed a pull-up.

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